The Universe has a unique ability to send you what you need, and while it may not be what you want, I assure you it is what you need.
I'm pretty sure you have a good sense of who I am, that's why you're here with me now right.
However, if we are yet to delve deep, do to those places you thought I couldn't see, thought I'd never know about... I'm about to burst your bubble and hold your hand at the same time.
One of the most positive people you'll meet, I make it my daily mantra to make someone smile, to proffer a kind word, a helpful hint... a smiley hug from afar...
Because it's the best ripple effect out there, and whatever you give out, you get back tenfold!
But that's not why I do it ~ nope!
I choose to give without expectation, I choose to give 'just because'...
I have often spoken to the phrase every cloud has a silver lining, which simply references the ability to find something good hidden within something that doesn't look good.
If you don't see the silver lining ~ look closer my friends!
As we navigate our life and the experiences we have (both good and not so good) we need to see these are simply opportune moments in time, lessons in time if you will, and some lessons repeat as they are harder than others to learn...
Do we like our lessons...?
Not always ~ but they are invariably good for us, once we look closely and read between the lines.
As an entrepreneur, one of the toughest areas is self-doubt, self-blame, and that all time favourite: Imposter syndrome....
While I wholeheartedly support ownership of ones' actions, of full accountability, I do not support the negative self-blame-game: it simply has no place in business or in our life.
We cannot control what others think of us ~ we can only control what we think of ourselves...
If you seek harmony, then be harmonious in your actions.
If you seek a partner, then put the best version of yourself out there to attract the best version of him or her back.
If you seek success, then approach everything with a positive can-do success attitude.
Whatever you want in life, it's yours for the taking if you simply be your authentic self: nothing more, nothing less.
Let go of whatever drags you down, whether that be procedures, people or negative chatter.
As a visionary, my mind is often working overtime and most definitely ahead of it's time, and I've had moments in my career where others have laid unfair claims at my door...
The younger me took these inaccuracies to heart, let the arrow pierce my naive skin and infuse poison into my bloodstream...
I would withdraw, pull back from the offending arrow and somewhat lick my wound... not a productive place to be at all.
The wiser me has learned that when an arrow is launched, one simply sinks and turns out of its way, and allows the arrow to pass me by.
I cannot prevent someone launching an arrow at either of us, and neither can you ~ so don't try.
It is up to you and I to react positively, as only our actions can turn this around.
I recently had an interaction with someone who did not understand the complexity of 'who' I was, and definitely underestimated the complexity of 'what' I can do. Pretty sure I blew his mind, and that made him rather uneasy...
His reaction was unexpectedly adverse, and a tad hostile at times ~ all of which I diffused with ease... something my naive younger self would not have done...
Oh my, how I've grown...
I am fortunate to have an awesome friend who cheers me from the sidelines, and he has taught me never to defend if someone questions, simply to 'be' there and focus on exactly what is occurring in that moment, in the 'present' no more, no less.
For this recent interaction, I stood my ground effortlessly, professionally and confidently.
After the meeting, as I tiptoed back through the conversation, looking for learnable takeaways, I was reminded of a time about 6 years ago when I had some inaccurate comments spoken about me... And I found myself wondering if this has occurred for you...?
How about I share where I once was, and you take a think to see if it resonates with something you've had to deal with, as I expect it has...
- I don't know what I'm doing...
- wanna bet... try me 😉
- I'm not Asian
- seriously, you only just noticed this...?
- I remake the moves, I'm a rebel without a cause
- I refresh the moves... and I have a cause, and it's awesome!
- My training is not good enough
- haha, are we still on that stupid point... 🤦♀️
- I'm not authentically original
- hello, have we not met... do keep up ~ there's only one Sam!
At the time, I didn't like any of this, it really hurt and I'm pretty sure you can relate in some way right...
Yeah, we've all had our detractors, and we've all allowed some of their potshots to land on our chin.
No more peeps. Gloves up!
At that moment though, I didn't have any gloves to protect myself, I didn't have the confidence I have now. I absorbed everything, took on their negative thoughts, and had to go within my spiritual self to stand tall, and that spiritual self was still young...
I grew immensely after that incident, and the best thing that I did, even before I gained the wisdom I have today is that I am proud I did not engage that person... I did not fight back.
Trust me, I wanted to, more than you'll ever know...
It wasn't easy to be quiet... Sam is rarely quiet...
I am blessed to have a Sifu who guides my Tai Chi training and spiritual lessons with the softest approach I've ever known. He could lay me flat with a martial art move in a heartbeat, he could close my spiritual mind with a sharp word... but he never will.
For he has taught me that:
"In softness there is strength, in stillness there is motion and in slowness there is speed"
I ask you to take on this mantra next time something negative happens to you.
You are unable to stop whatever they choose to do... and any fight you present, will simply exhaust you.
Be calm, acknowledge the arrow, the barb, the potshot headed your way, and simply sink and turn out of its way to let it fly past you and land in no-mans land.
One of my biggest Aha moments though, came from a young lady by the name of Taylor as she cheekily looked straight into the camera (and at me) and sang out the words I clearly needed to hear way back then.
As her first chorus opened up about staying out too late, nothing in her brain, and she began a comical video ~ I knew I was gonna be ok.
I knew I was gonna shake it off.... and I know you can too!